Counsellor and counselee relationship tips

6 Ways Counselors Connect with Clients - WFU Online Counseling

counsellor and counselee relationship tips

In supervision, one of my students talked about working with a client who was dealing with a relationship concern. My student has some definite. As a counselor, connecting with clients is one of if not the most important aspect of forming a trusting relationship with your client. This is easier said than done. Learn more about common relationship problems and how counselling may help these relationships offer an important source of advice, guidance, love and.

Whatever the relationship issue, there is help available. Relationship counselling is one option - whether as a couple or an individual - you can talk about your concerns and your needs, and explore what you want from your relationships.

By speaking to a professional, you can learn more about yourself while also receiving the support and guidance you may need to get back on track. Why do we need good relationships? Humans are naturally very sociable. We enjoy the company of others and crave positive interactions and meaningful friendships. To some extent, good relationships are just as important for our survival as food and water, which can explain why when our relationships suffer, our health and happiness is also affected.

The effects of loneliness and isolation can be as harmful as smoking 15 cigarettes a day, and is more damaging than obesity. Learn more about the effects of loneliness and how to stay connected. In the workplace, having good relationships with colleagues and others in the professional circle boosts productivity and is valuable for career development.

Poor relationships, both in and out of work, can affect stress levels and impact your work-life balance. Learn how to manage stress at work and how you can help yourself. What defines a good relationship? Each relationship is built around trust because this enables us to communicate effectively and form strong bonds.

counsellor and counselee relationship tips

A good relationship comes with a level of mindfulness that makes you aware of what you say and do and that helps to support a strong relationship. But there are several characteristics that generally mean you have a strong, healthy connection with someone. Trust - Relationships are built on trust, which is essential for good communication and forming strong bonds with people. Without trust, relationships are unlikely to survive.

For whom and when counselling can be required and beneficial: Counsellors can talk you through a whole range of issues or problems. Here are some of the life problems, situations, and emotions they can help you out with, put in words with which you can easily relate.

How to Build a Trusting Counselor Patient Relationship

Anyone, who has been through an unfortunate event such as divorce, death of a loved one, surviving a life threatening illness, or losing a job. Feeling stressed out, for example unable to handle stress at work and examination tension for students. Anyone having relationship problems with family, friends and at work. Anyone who has had problems or experiences in the past, they are not able to overcome and move on with life.

If you are finding even normal actions irritating and are having a constant feeling of being under pressure. Inability to cope with routine situations. Being overwhelmed, angry and do not know how to make things better. Feeling rootless, directionless, empty, or even trapped, as well as unsure of your place in the world.

Are tearful, restless and perhaps do not sleep well. Nothing seems to give you any pleasure.

counsellor and counselee relationship tips

You feel you are not good at what you do. Feeling agitated, uptight and wound-up all the time, unable to focus or remember simple things. Burnt out, hopeless, lack motivation, or have low self-esteem. Parent and child relationship problems.

Anyone undergoing some kind of mental or physical trauma. An issue or situation, seriously affecting your day-to-day life. You just need someone to confide in.

Being depressed or feeling grief after a major or a minor event is normal and the unhappiness should start to dissipate after sometime, depending on the situation, however if it does not then seek help.

Counselling may take time to work, depending upon the nature and number of problems presented by the client and his or her capacity to cope and change. Sometimes, a single or a few sessions are all that is needed. At other times, longer periods, possibly months or up to a couple of years may be required. Counsellors, Counselee and the Relationship: The role of a counsellor is not to tell you how to run your life.

Relationship problems

Good counsellors listen, support and challenge, so that you are able to come up with your own solutions. That simply means that your counsellor will work to help you solve your own problems. Genuineness and Warmth Effective counsellors have a genuine interest in other people. They should have respect and unconditional positive regard for their clients. Education Formal degrees in psychology do not necessarily make good counsellors, but a common sense approach is not sufficient. Good counsellors are willing and able to learn about themselves and other people too.

Hence it is also important for the therapist to employ these individual counselling micro- skills in order to enhance the quality and effectiveness of the process. The first of these skills involves joining and listening effectively, wherein the initial meeting with a client becomes an important step in forming a client-therapist relationship.

As discussed earlier, client's tend to form their perceptions of the relationship in the beginning of the process and these perceptions may last throughout.

Hence, though joining may not occur entirely in the first meeting itself and is often a continuous process, a therapist should greet the client in a manner true to themselves. In order to build the relationship, it is essential that the individual feel at ease with the counsellor. Putting the client at ease is therefore an important micro-skill, since it enhances positive regard for them and makes an individual feel comfortable settling in.

Thus, the relationship may be established before beginning to work on the issues at hand.


Counsellor-Counselee Relationship 4 Observing the client also involves certain aspects of empathy, as the therapist attempts to create an understanding of the client's world through their non-verbal behaviour and can use this information to form the relationship.

The invitation to talk is another skill that employs a counsellor's unconditional positive regard, as it reassures and encourages a client. By doing this a client may feel more comfortable with sharing and it is then important to ensure they know the counsellor is 'tuning in'.

This skill is also an example of using elements of empathy to build the client- counsellor relationship, since it requires the counsellor to be at the same "wavelength" as the client.

Therefore, Joining is about establishing the connection between the two individuals. Listening to the client with interest is also an important micro-skill to use in order to help the client talk freely and sort through their problems. It involves the use of minimal reaffirming responses, while also occasionally urging the client to continue. It is also essential for the therapist to monitor their own non-verbal behaviour to enhance the counselling process with techniques such as matching, or physical closeness etc.

These may help bring about a change in a client's emotional state.

counsellor and counselee relationship tips

Similarly, to create an empathic relationship with a client, the use of one's voice with respect to clarity, volume and tone may elucidate the attempt at establishing such a relationship. Other skills such as reflection of content and feelings may be used separately or in combination. It may be more useful at times to combine this type of reflection into one response. One has to also be able to decide when to use either type of reflection or the combination of both, so as to ensure an appropriate helping response.

The greater use of reflection of feeling may help a client experience their emotions in a freer manner, thereby helping them reduce their levels of incongruence Rogers, Certain skills may also act as hindrances.

For instance, the use of questions in the counselling process may prove to be an overuse of the skill. Thus, it may create an environment where the client feels interrogated, or perhaps the questions may even satisfy the counsellor's curiosity instead of enabling the addressing of issues. If questions feel intrusive or create a power imbalance, it my affect the relationship of the counsellor and client thereby compromising the counselling process.

They may also take away from the person-centered approach and the client may become dependent on the counsellor's questions to work through any issue.

Therefore, in order to ensure questions do not become a hindrance to the process, they should be used when necessary. While they may be open or close ended, or have specific purposes, they should be used sparingly in comparison with the other micro skills, so as to not diminish the quality of the counselling relationship. Counsellor-Counselee Relationship 5 Summarising, is another important micro skill involved in the steps to establish a counselling relationship.